"My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, he is my fortress, I will never be shaken." -Psalm 62: 1-2

This past week the Lord has been drawing into me as I have drawn into him. At a conference this past week I really felt called to sit back and just hangout with God. There was amazing worship two times a day at this conference. There were great singers, lots of instruments, smoke, colored lights, and hundreds of crazy Christian kids jumping around. While all of those things are nice, God really spoke to me and said, "Cassie, I don't need all of those things from you to show me you love me. Just sit with me and rest." So throughout the week that's exactly what I did. While there was organized chaos (so it seemed) around me, the Lord quieted my heart and spoke tenderly to me. I was reminded that so often we want God to speak to us through the thunder but more times often than not, he is in that faint whisper.

One of my favorite places to be in the world is hanging out with my earthly Dad, James. He is, hands down, the most amazing man I know. Even so, that one of the last things my Mom said to me before she passed away was, "Cassie Denise, do not settle for any man who is less than your father. You deserve the best and that's exactly what he is!" My Dad has been such a great example of a father to me throughout my life. I have been blessed by that and now understand God as our Father more intimately. Just as my Dad, James wants me to hangout and watch the game with him, My heavenly Daddy longs even more for me to spend time with him, Many times not even saying a word. Just resting with my Daddy and knowing that my soul will only find rest in Him.

*I had to put a shoutout picture up on this one for my Daddy! Writing this post reminded me of a shirt I wore when I was little that said "If you think i'm cute...you should see my Daddy!" *I love you, Daddy!!!*

-Be Blessed-

This year in Jeffrey's Bay I have fallen in love. There is no doubt in my mind now that love at first sight exists. From the moment I saw Cupcake last year, my heart was hers. I guarantee if you were to spend a day with her, she would have your heart as well.

One day last semester, God ‘just happened' to place a crèche in our House Ministries path. That is where I met my "Cupcake." I coined that name for her the first day I met her because honestly, I cannot pronounce her Xhosa name. Also, Cupcake is a little ‘chunk'. To me… she just looks like a little cupcake. Cupcakes mother, Gladys, is in charge of the crèche. Her mother is a heavy drinker and her father is married and has a complete other family. Cupcake lives with her grandmother because of her living situation at home but sees her mom daily at the crèche. I am so thankful that another girl on my team, Jenny, has heard God clearly and ministers to Gladys and pours our Lord's goodness into her whenever possible. Jenny has bought most of the family Xhosa Bibles and she prays and reads scripture with them often. I truly believe that God is using us to show that family His love.

I will be honest and tell you that I am obsessed with this child. I would bring Cupcake home with me in a split second if I could. Don't worry, her mother already "okayed" it and has Cupcake calling me Mom! (My Dad wouldn't mind a bit either) It's hard to explain how much joy I get when I see this child. Each day when I walk down the road she comes running full speed at me with her chunky little legs, half of her stomach usually hanging out, and a huge smile on her face. It makes every second I spend here in Africa meaningful.

Cupcake and I are soul mates. I believe that if I was a 5 year old black child I would be Cupcake. We are alike in almost every way possible. She is unbelievably entertaining, makes the most randomly weird faces at me (FYI: She loves the "fish face"), loves attention, loves to dance, sings constantly, and is just down right crazy!

Daily God teaches me about his love for me through Cupcake. I had known that Cupcake had been saving the money she could find on the ground for quite some time. One day she had me walk with her to a convenient store to buy something. I was so excited to get to share the joy with her of saving her money. She purchased two pears with her 1 rand (about 15 cents) and insisted that I eat the other one.(Picture included!) Cupcake had so little and had worked so hard for 1 rand but she loved me enough to want me to share that gift with her. I saw Jesus that day in a five year old Xhosa speaking child.

I am so blessed and thankful for the exciting and new ways God is speaking to me and teaching me. Each day that I set out for ministry I know that I will be surprised in the ways that I see God.

I ask that you join with me in praying for Cupcake and her family. I can't even stand the thought of the heartache I will feel when I must leave her come mid-May. Although, I know that God has placed me in her life at this time to plant a seed that will one day sprout into everlasting joy. And trust me, when the Lord gets a hold on my Cupcake's life…that girl is going to change the world for the Kingdom!

-Be Blessed-

"Praise be to you, O Lord, God of our father Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O Lord, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all. Wealth and honor come from you; you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength to all. Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name. But who am I, and who are my people, that we should be able to give as generously as this? Everything comes from you, and we have given you only what comes from your hand."

-1 Chronicles 29: 10-14

As you may or may not know, there is a tavern here in Jeffrey's Bay that has been placed on the hearts of a few of the girls on my team; namely the house ministries team. There was a vision given to us last semester to bring the Tavern to Kingdom of God. This vision has given us fire and passion like nothing before. Over Christmas break Amber raised around $2,500 (U.S.) in order for use to be able to talk to the owners about purchasing the Tavern. As of now, money is not the concern we have. If we need financial support we know God will provide abundantly; there is no doubt in our minds about that. The above verse in Chronicles even reminds me that the tavern is already His. I just yearn to see His spirit reign down with fire upon that place and in the hearts of the people there. Right now I am asking you to partner with Me, Amber, Sarah, Jenny, and the rest of the J-Bay team in praying and fasting for a clear path. We are really seeking the Lord with our whole hearts right now. This week we are fasting and praying during our lunch hour in order for God to give us words and a purposeful day.

On Monday, our first day of fasting, the owners of the tavern actually invited us into their house and sat and talked to us about what we were doing there. Peela and Joel ( the tavern owners) at least seemed interested in what we had to say. We bolded laid before them our hearts and our passion for their building. Peela and Joel both go to the ZedCC church which practices ancestor worship. After talking with the owners a few times I know that the Lord wants them for his Kingdom. It's not even so much about the Tavern at this moment. As a group we feel the Lord pulling us to really focus on having a heart for these people like he does. I truly want my heart to break for these individuals like the Lord's does. I want to see them as precious children who can do immeasurably more for the Kingdom. Our leader Christian said something to me that plays constantly in my head when I think about the tavern. She said, "Bring them Jesus and they are going to jump on board with His vision." Ah, what a sweet truth.

Today, Aaryn and Chelsea both joined us in prayer and spoke so much truth into the four of us. I really feel like the Lord is showing up in massive ways during our fast and prayers. Aaryn really felt the Lord telling her that we are going to have to be very persistent in our efforts at the tavern. She said God may be calling us to go and petition often and several times before we see any change, much like Moses and Aaron in Exodus. Chelsea felt the Lord wanting to protect our hearts. As a ministry team we are totally in this with our full hearts. But at the same time we really need to seek the Lord's heart and make that become our desire. I am so blessed to have people on my team that are willing to fight alongside me. It makes working for the kingdom such a sweet life.

I ask of you to be in prayer and/or fasting with us about vision for the tavern, Joel, and Peela. If you hear a word from God or just feel the need to encourage us then we would love to hear from you. I praise God daily for the opportunity to really pour my heart and soul into these three months I have left in Jeffrey's. Thank you for all of your support. We appreciate everything!

I thought everyone would like to know of a recent event that I now find very comical and "African." If you have a weak stomach and don't enjoy lots of detail then I wouldn't read this JThis past Sunday I was cooking lunch for the team. I was just about finished when I opened some cans of corn and green beans. As I proceeded to throw the cans away I sliced my finger open on the lid of one of those cans. Immediately blood came exploding out of my finger like Mount Saint Helens had just erupted; I'm talking like, plasma and all. There was a good size puddle of blood in my hand and now on our kitchen floor. As Tiffany screamed and didn't know what to do my first thought was to yell Aaryn's name. Why? Because Aaryn always knows what to do, of course! Aaryn took me to the sink to bleed over that and grabbed me a dish towel to put pressure on the wound. Although, I did feel bad because at Family Meeting Holly expressed that she was annoyed that our dish towels keep getting ruined. Despite, I used one to grasp my wound. If you have ever cut your finger badly before you know that it bleeds quiet a bit. Seeing as I am anemic, I knew losing the amount of blood I had wasn't a good thing.

Of course it was Sunday afternoon and all of the leaders were gone with all of the cars. Ten minuets passed and Chris came to my rescue. Chris and Katie were my rock stars of the day. Funny how the two people with the weakest stomachs on the team took care of me! They drove me (well Chris pretty much flew there) to Humansdorp to the nearest hospital; 20 minuets away. On the way there I passed out once in the van. Walking into the hospital I passed out again and Katie had to lift me! When we finally made it to the right place Chris tried to find someone to help us. The only part of the conversation I heard from Chris was, "I'll freaking buy her lunch, I have a girl in the waiting room that is bleeding a lot, anemic, and passing out." Supposedly, the receptionist was out to lunch and wouldn't check anyone in until she got done eating. I proceeded to pass out in Katie's lap for the third time. I wake up to this nurse pushing me asking my name. I then was forced to walk all the way down the hall to show some random lady my finger. This lady says to me "Oh, it's only a minor cut… Go sit down!!" I suppose she didn't care that I was passing out every five minuets. Now, I know that my cut really wasn't too bad BUT passing out was not a good thing. I went through all of this to hear the nurse tell me that my doctor would be waiting in his surgical ward in J-Bay for me. Are you serious? We drove BACK 20 min. to J-bay and let Dr. Meyers put two stitches in my finger. I am fine now and have all my energy back. Nothing but a mere flesh wound!

My only thought in Humansdorp was "I will never come to this hospital again!" Little did I know I would return to that hospital that very night. That is a different story for a different time.

"Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!" Psalm 34:8

This week in Jeffrey's was my first "official" week of ministry. I could have not been more blessed by it. Each house visit I did I felt so uplifted in seeing the fruit God had placed in my path. I felt as if this was the most amazing piece of "fruit" ever tasted. Figuratively speaking, as I bit into it the sweet juices and freshness of the Lord started flowing upon me and my ministry partners. God was telling me "Oh, taste and see that I am good." Praise Him!

A visit to a good friend of mine, Noma, really showed me how God wants to do immeasurably more through me this semester. Noma has AIDS and has been on the verge of death multiple times over the past semester. She was only 40k (88lbs) and almost 6ft tall. Needless to say, Noma had no strength or appetite. On top of that Noma's feet were always so swollen that it was almost impossible for her to walk. There have been countless prayers for Noma and her health. Relying on my own flesh, I was scared to come back to J-Bay this January because I didn't figure Noma would be around any longer. But in tasting and seeing how great that our God is, I came back to a Noma who had gained 8k (18lbs), had no swollen feet, could walk perfectly to come sit with us, and up fixing food. What a massive answer to prayer! Noma said that she was getting tests done this week to see if she was now healthy enough to start taking the ARVs to help her start living a more normal life. Last semester we didn't ever see this day coming!

I had a great conversation with Noma that day. I came to visit Noma and bless her. Little did I know what a huge blessing she was going to be? She filled me with an overflowing joy and encouragement. Noma spoke of the hope that she had in our Lord. She knew that He was going to give her strength and she trusted Him wholeheartedly in that. Noma said she has even been speaking to her friends who are positive (HIV) and speaking life into them. Telling them that they cannot give up and they must press on with whatever the Lord has provided in their life. WOW! All the while I'm thinking of what an amazing disciple maker God is making of Noma and she has no clue! Noma told us how easy it would be to go to the government and start getting grants because of her sickness but since she was able to be up around and working that she didn't need handouts. The Lord gave her strength and she was going to use it to the fullest. Her positive attitude and willingness has totally put her in a place where God can grow the most wonderful fruit through and around her.

Noma has been teaching me to take the good and the bad in my life and hand it over to our Lord. Once I give up the control of it, He will turn it into the sweetest fruit imaginable. If I take refuge in the Lord and allow the blessing to overflow in me I cannot imagine the goodness and joy that will come! I can't wait to see what else God's going to rock this year!!

"For the Kingdom of God is not a matter of what we eat or drink, but of living a life of goodness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit." -Romans 14:17

For some time now God has been laying this verse on my heart. He has really been teaching me about how caught up I can get in the whole "routine" of Christianity and religion. Often times I see myself as a part of the Body who is more concerned with regulations and denominational values than with living a life of goodness in the Holy Spirit. Now, don't get me wrong; I'm not saying there is anything wrong with denominations or the values they hold to. I love my home church and was pretty much born into the Methodist church. What I am saying is often times I see the Body of Christ, myself included, being wrapped up in things that don't necessarily matter in the Kingdom.

I think that being a part of a nondenominational missionary group has really helped me see things the way God sees them. I mean, I'm when God introduces Himself he doesn't attach Methodist, Baptist, Catholic, to the end of his introduction. Ha!

I suppose that the Lord is taking me through a season that I would like to call, No Restrictions. No restrictions in the way I learn about Him, pray to Him, worship Him, serve Him, love Him, and seek Him. Nothing holding me back to living a life overflowing with the goodness, peace, and joy that comes from truly living in the Spirit. Through this I am learning to completely surrender myself to the Lords timing. There are things in this world that I want so badly to have right now…But the Lord says "wait." I know that in surrendering things to Him, He will give them back to me in a more abundant way.

My prayer for this semester in Jeffrey's is that my team, leaders, and I live and serve with absolutely no restrictions. I pray that we each, in our own ways, are pushed to the limits. "Going big, or going home." I pray that none of us are concerned with anything but living life fully in the Spirit and expecting God to do immeasurably more through us. Wow! The fruit God will show us if we honestly live this way!! THIS is the day of small beginnings!!

_Cassie_

" But my life is worth nothing unless I use it for doing the work assigned me by the Lord Jesus- the work of telling others the Good News about God's wonderful kindness and love."

Acts 20:24

For a few years now God has given me this verse over and over again. He reiterates in me, each time I read this verse, that it is the calling He has placed on my life. In fact, it is the calling that He has placed on all of our lives. I wonder often why we, as a body of believers, insist on a college education, a nice house, 2.5 children, and a Honda. Where in the scripture is it laid out that our lives are supposed to look like that? God is beginning to reveal in me that the way I think life is suppose to work and look is totally opposite of His and what he has for me.

Most would agree that Jesus is the one model that we are called to shape our life like. I think most Christians embrace and understand this concept. But then again, if we were truly to "embrace" this concept, in its fullness, I believe our lives would look very different. Doesn't the life of Jesus display, in all facets, a life of undignified, selfless living? Am I living like that? Sure, I'd love to say yes… but in reality I can't.

God is taking me to some really cool places in my relationship with Him. The nice little box that God has been in most of my life has been demolished. Each day it seems God reveals Himself to me in a brand new way. How incredibly refreshing our Savior is!

Today I had time to sit down and get quiet with God and ask him a question. The question was, "Where/When/How will I choose/begin to remain in the Lord?" Knowing that God wants to show how powerful and mighty he is through someone who has a heart of full commitment led me to ask that question of myself. Through this time the Lord revealed to me so much. Each time I had a revelation with the Lord today He brought the Acts 20:24 verse to my heart and aligned it all together in accordance to the work of telling others the Good News about God. There are three specific things which God has spoken to me today that I feel called to share.

1. Be willing to sacrifice going back to school if He says "Go elsewhere"

2. Call people out to partner with me in what God is doing. (There were two people I felt God leading me to)

3. Take the courage God has given me to move…and move.

In all honesty I would love to go back to college and be with all of my friends. Though lately I ask myself if that would be living in what all God has for me. I truly feel that He does have so much more for me than what most would consider a "normal life." At this moment I can't imagine being trapped in a classroom taking notes and listening to lectures. I can't imagine myself doing this because I've seen the need of this world first hand. The need that I have seen consumes me. At this moment I am not sure of what God has for my future. Although I do feel like this is the first moment I've been okay with not knowing. If I am to go back to school… Awesome. But if God calls me to another country or something else…Awesome! What makes me most excited about my future is the people I feel God telling me to call out and partner with me in whatever he is already doing. I can't wait to share God's vision and really seek His will with these individuals. God has filled me with so much courage this past week as a leader. He is calling me to keep moving and moving is what I'll be doing!

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"Or don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life."

On Saturday, November 10, I was baptized at sunset in the healing waters of Jeffrey's Bay, South Africa. I must say that it was one of the greatest experiences of my life. For all of you who wanted to be there I will give you a little play-by-play of the event!

Around sunset our family headed out to a beach near by SuperTubes. All 20 of us plus Jaup attended the baptism of Ms. Jenny Nelson and me. After hundreds of pictures we went to sit on the beach for what we like to call a little "P and Dub" (Praise and Worship). We sang Hungary, God of Wonders, and Amazing Grace. Sitting on the beach in worship, as the waves crash around you, and the blazing sun sets upon the water is one of the most amazing experiences ever. After this, Tag talked a little about what baptism means. He talked about how like the sand covers us, so is our life covered with sin. Then, after our baptism, we are washed free from the sand (sin) that once took hold of our being. Tag then gave Jenny and me a few moments to talk to the group and tell them why we were being baptized.

I am so thankful that I had never been baptized before that moment. I was dedicated when I was 6 months old but I had never made the decision by myself to be baptized. I know now that God was holding my decision off to the most perfect moment ever. I feel like in J-Bay, part of my worldly self has died. I am no longer a friend of this world. Now I walk fully alive in Christ: Dead to sin and alive in Him. That is what my baptism symbolized to me.

Tag then took us down to the water to be baptized. The waves were super huge and we got swept away a few times but it made for a pretty funny experience. I thought it was really amazing that Tag had me ask a few of the girls come in the water with me to be a part of it. I asked Aaryn, Chelsea, Tiff, and Amber to come pray over me before I was immersed. They are all like big sisters to me and such great Christian examples for me to follow. It was such a joy to have them right there at such an important moment in my life.

Also, having Tag baptize me was very symbolic to me. First off Tag Thompson is one of the most amazing persons on this planet. What was really cool to me is that Tag reminds me so much of my mentor and hero, Stephen Moad. If I was back in the states there is no doubt in my mind that I would want Moad to be the one to baptize me. So in retrospect, having Tag baptized me was like having Moad here being a part of it all. I am so thankful and honored that Tag was excited and willing to "conduct" my baptism. All in all it was one of the greatest moments in my life. I wish that everyone who is important in my life could have been there but hopefully through this blog you can feel like you got to participate aswell!!

This morning around 10am I called the doctor to get the results of my CT scan that I had the previous day. The doctor said that my results came back fine and everything looked great. There was nothing wrong with me! Okay great news right? Well, yes I'm so very glad there wasn't anything wrong; but I knew there was something wrong with me. It's so frustrating to me.

The frustration brought me to tears. Holly and Christian (my leaders) took me aside to talk to me and we all decided just to have everyone pray over me. It was time to fight for it! Praise God for my J-Bay family. I love them so much I can't even explain it to you.

I lay down in the middle and everyone started praying and speaking truth over me. At this point God started to give me a vision. It's really hard to explain but I'll do my best.

I felt there was a battle going on in my mind. All I could see was darkness fighting light. It went on for several minutes and I could see that it was an intense battle. The vision diminished when I started to speak truth out loud about how God was my healer and my ultimate provider. I continued to cast out fear and my sickness. After this Matt (a J-Bay family member), who is ultra talented, felt like they should sing some praise songs over me. He got his guitar and they begin to sing praises to the Lord. I really couldn't tell you what songs were sung. As the voices were lifted up to God, He began to complete my vision that He had given me earlier.

The battle was over. I saw myself amongst huge waves of water. I'm not just talking about some cool surfing waves either. I'm talking about huge-hairy-nasty-crazy waves. This made me very scared but at once I felt someone grab my hand. A huge flood of peace and safety came over me. I walked out to the waters and it was like I was being baptized in the waters. As I was being put under water I felt so much breaking off. Like bondage being broken from me. Lies and every false thing that had I had believed was being taken from me. When I came back up from the water and took my first breath I felt so alive. I'm talking about crazy-alive. Alive like never before. It was like God had taken me from death to life. It was a death that I had succumbed to from this world to a true life in Him.

I opened my eyes and shared my vision with my group. Although, I probably didn't explain it as well as I just was able to write it out. The really cool thing to me is the peace I feel right now writing this. I have an overflowing since of God wanting to heal me, my spirit, and every part of my brokenness.

Jenny (a J-Bay family member), whom I adore, said that God had given her a vision too as we prayed. She said that she saw me down in the waters of J-Bay and that everyone else was sitting up on the beach watching. Wow! Our God is so stinkin' amazing! It's so awesome how there is no way to doubt the vision God has given me. God gave me that through Jenny. Right now I really feel God telling me to be baptized in the waters of J-Bay.

The Healing Waters… His Healing Waters.... The Waters of Life…

Amen!